love, soccer & cake
Thursday, December 14, 2006 at 10:26PM Hafiz: “The subject tonight is Love and for tomorrow night as well. As a matter of fact, I know of no better topic for us to discuss until we all die!” Except soccer & cake, of course. But first the love. The news of the week – Jenna (Jim’s just-turned-20-I-won’t-get-married-until-I’ve-
seen-the-world-finished-school-and-am-at-least-26-and-working-on-my-
PhD sister) is engaged. I love Jenna. I love Love. I love the Tyler she’s marrying. I love seeing them in love. But I laugh at the things love does to us. It is truly the exception maker.
I sometimes rub Jim’s feet, a body part I long ago renounced. I watch the Superbowl (even if half the watching is done with eyes closed) just to be on the couch by him. I occasionally iron shirts. I now eat fast food. And this is just the small stuff. When I met Jim Scott I was plane-ticket-bought- boxes-half-packed ready to move to New York in a month. My next adventure…and nothing got in the way of my adventure schemes (good judgment included). The weeks passed…boxes slowly unpacked, plans gradually disappeared, and an unused airplane ticket hardly seemed important. I was in Love. And he was The One.
Love can be cruel, untimely, even ironic, but its hidden gifts are limitless. Yes, I am now more dependent than I EVER imagined being. Yes, I find myself daydreaming of graduate school and world travel. But - and the “but” is bigger than Big - though the exception-making of love blasts away yourself as you know you, the self that emerges in its stead is somehow More. I can no longer imagine myself not melded flesh to flesh, thought to thought, heart to heart with this once upon a time foreigner Jim Scott. What’s more, I don’t want to.
Of course, I’m still selfish; yes, we fight; no, I don’t always make the exceptions I should; and yes, "occasionally" means twice a year in regards to ironing. But it has been 8 years of knowing and it seems like 8 billion. I honestly don’t remember the time before. I don’t remember hearing something (funny, sad, scary) and not instantly wondering what Jim will think when I tell him. I don’t remember feeling something (fear, sorrow, joy) and not instantly wanting to share it with Jim. Inextricably intertwined.
And I am awed at all the Exceptions he has made for me.
But, back to Jenna…married at 20 or 26, this is a girl who will get things done. She will finish school and see the world and do dozens of things infinitely more important in the process. The timetable may change...with exceptions scattered along the way…the ultimate desires may even change…but with Jenna I don’t doubt that the end result will be Big. And Tyler will compliment her well on the journey to becoming More.
Aidan & I were discussing the upcoming nuptials, and this is what he said, “I’m not going to get married. I want to be on a soccer team.” That was yesterday. I chuckled inside. A lot. This morning I wanted to revisit the topic so I asked him if he wants to get married when he grows up. His response: “No. I want to play basketball and football and soccer.” Me: Can’t you do that if you’re married? Him: “Can we talk about this later Mom. I’m busy in my space galaxy.” Another chuckle is stifled…he wants to be taken seriously so I try. It is serious, though. I’m honestly not sure that soccer and marriage can co-exist in one galaxy. No doubt, should his dreams stay the same, Aidan is tenacious enough to find the exception.
As for the cake, well, Jenna is a brave soul who is letting me make her wedding cake. I’m beyond excited. I don’t get enough chances to do things like this. Thank you for the exception!
Reader Comments (5)
It's very funny how we have such a plan for our lives, and it totally goes by the way side. Remember how we were convinced we would only marry someone who spoke Japanese? Ha! As if our lives were an episode of "The Bachelor." You don't speak Japanese? No rose for you.
I am so excited for you to make Jenna's wedding cake! I can't wait to see pictures. I'm sure it is going to be amazing!